omg dat wuz liek super kool!!!!!!!

Remember the days when it wuz kool 2 type like dis?

Everybody was on Xanga, throwing up what I call “thought dumps.” At age 13. Even though I took part of the latter, I never took part in the former. And I take great pride in that. Still, I think there’s some commentary to be had about this sort of thing.

What do the cool 13-year-old kids use nowadays? It seems like Myspace has fallen off even harder than Xanga has (I still know people who use Xanga consistently), and the kids are now flocking to Facebook or Youtube. However, there’s one major difference: kids are now using correct grammar and punctuation. Shocking, right?

It’s interesting that purposeful bad grammar even became a fad in the first place. To my knowledge, the use of purposeful bad grammar and one-letter words came to being in the telegraph days when users were charged by the character. I mean, now it makes sense why we even have these shortened words, but what caused them to be revived? The world may never know. And now that the fad is disappearing, the world may never know it existed.

But they will. Everything on the internet is eternal (as long as server computers and databases continue to run, but that’s another entry). Go back to where you wrote what you wrote five years ago, and just stare at it. If it’s still there and you don’t do anything about it, chances are it’ll continue to be there for the next several years–or maybe even the next decade or century. It’s an unsettling thought, isn’t it? You may think Facebook posts and comments wash away after a few days, but the truth is, there are hundreds of thousands of servers out there saving every word of every single post and comment you make. And since they’re now hidden from easy access, there’s nothing you can do to retrieve it.

Let this be a lesson, guys. Even though it certainly didn’t start as one, nor did I intend for it to be one. The internet isn’t like real life: words don’t just disappear into thin air. They’re forever ingrained in plaques made of ones and zeroes, and people will always use them to judge you.

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Noses

Today I am going to bring some hard, crushing reality, and it’s about that thing on the center of your face.

yer nose.

The hairs in your nose are to keep things from entering too deep into your nostrils. They also serve as feelers, so when something enters too deep, you can remove them (but how you remove them is your choice).

There is a reason we have two nostrils: some smells take longer for our smell receptacles to register, and therefore need more time within the nose. If you notice, one of your nostrils always feels slightly more clogged than the other, even if you feel like your nose is completely clear.

Speaking of smelling, smells come from the particles of objects that fly around in the air, entering your nose and getting caught on the smell receptacles before the air finally enters the lungs. For example, when you smell coffee, you’re actually smelling coffee particles flying around in the air. This also means that when somebody makes a smelly fart, the particles of his or her poop hangs in your face and flies around in your lungs. HOW DOES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL?